It Pays to Step Up
Responsibility has its pros and cons. With age comes more responsibility. You have to show your parents (or anyone) that you can be trusted. I'm sure you would agree with that.
Responsibility: Pros and Cons. 
Me and my cousin Maya in Chicago
Pros: You are more independent than when you were younger. You have more freedom. You can go places without supervision—like the mall or movies.
Cons: Your family and teachers expect more of you now that you're in middle school. They expect you to use your new freedom wisely.
CloseYou're up
One part of being responsible is stepping up to the plate and admitting whether you're right or wrong. "Having
integrity," my fifth-grade teacher used to call it.
Integrity
Having integrity means being reliable, trustworthy, and living by your moral values.CloseHere are the steps to earning more responsibility:
- Earn trust. Learn how to become dependable.
- Be accountable for your actions—take control, even when you mess up.
- Develop a positive attitude towards others.
- Show you can do all these things when you're not with an adult.
Earn trust
Ways to earn trustExamples: Ways to Earn Trust Some examples are:
- Do your homework.
- Do your chores around the house without being asked.
- Work hard to get good grades.
Basically, these are things you should know. This shouldn't be news to you.
Nobody is perfect and, honestly, I have to admit I still struggle with this, but by continuing to improve, you show you're trying and making a good effort.
Close"Teenagers who are responsible, in the long run, have more freedom than teenagers who aren't," my mom tells me.
This doesn't just apply for teenagers—it's for anybody. Showing you can be trusted is another way to gain responsibility.
One way to show adults that you can be trusted is by learning to think about the consequences of your actions before you do them. I call it "thinking things through on your own."
Examples: Thinking Things Through For example, before you eat all the candy your mom is storing in the food pantry for occasional treats, think it through.
Take a moment to imagine the scene in your mind:
- See yourself eating the candy, and having to do it in secret, all alone.
- See yourself lying to your parents or hiding your secret.
- If you know you get stomach aches from too much candy, feel the ache.
- See your parents finding out the truth—because you know they will.
- Imagine the consequences.
CloseWhen you think things through, so that an adult doesn't have to say "I told you so." You're showing that
you're ready for more responsibility.
Ready for More Responsibility This is probably the most difficult thing to do and it takes practice.
You may not realize you've missed your chance to think something through until you've made a mistake and it's too late.
CloseThis brings me to the next step, which is being accountable for your actions.
OK, you messed up
If you happen to mess up, always tell the truth. It's better to just say it than to have someone find out.
If you mess up, 'fess up! 
Fess Up! "If you mess up, fess up," implies you will be doing the right thing by owning up to your mistake.
CloseTelling the truth means not making excuses. This is something we all do. It's just as bad as putting things off, which I'll talk about later.
Make a decision to tell the truth and not make excuses. When you're making excuses, you're not being accountable for what you did. In other words, you're fibbing and putting the blame on someone else so you don't get in trouble.
When you do make a mistake,
get in the habit of admitting it.
Just Admit It After you've done what you need to do to clean up your mistake, don't waste your time being sad about messing up.
Instead, remember what happened, what you did so that you missed your chance to think it through first, and promise yourself that next time you'll catch it sooner.
Although you'll receive the consequences, at least you didn't lie about it.
CloseThat's what builds trust—you're showing adults that they can trust you...
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